richtmichnicht (richtmichnicht) wrote in veg_pothead,

Vegan Brownies


6 oz. unsweetened vegan chocolate (Hershey's works well)
1/2 cup vegan margarine (the harder, the better - squeezes not reccomended)
2/3 cup sugar
1/2 cup cocoa powder
2 eggs of powdered egg replacer (Ener-G works well)
1 tsp vanilla
1 cup flour
1/8 pot, or less (1/8 means you'll be wrecked by one brownie, so you can decrease it to be on the safe side but don't increase it unless you know what you're doing)

1. The first, and longest step, will be boiling the THC out of the grass and into the margarine.

For this, use any type of vegan margarine you like - any one will work. But remember, if it's really soft, it will take longer to re-solidify in the fridge (a later step).

If you're concerned about the smell of pot, STOP NOW. Making pot brownies will REEK every step of the way so unless it's 1. legal or 2. you're in a place where the smell will dissipate before reaching a curious party's nose (like the suburbs or countryside), it might be better to stop, to be honest.

If you're still with me, cool. Take half a cup vegan margarine and place it in a pot with about three to four cups of water. Bring to a boil. How much pot you add is up to you. Since this will be going in a 8 x 8 inch pan, you'll have about sixteen brownies, so I'd put in an eigth (or 3.5 grams). That way, one brownie will likely get you stoned. Grind the pot if you have a grinder of coffee grinder. If you can't, break it up the best you can. When the water's boiling, add all the pot in.

The trick with pot brownies is the longer you boil the water, the more THC will rise. The THC will rise and then, as it is fat-soluble, enter the margarine, where it stays. In general, the vast majority of the THC will rise within an hour of boiling, but if you can leave it on for a while, do. Two to three hours is best, any more and you're not going to see much of a difference.

When that time's up, remove the pot from the stove. If you wish, you can empty the pot's contents into another bowl, but I wouldn't reccomend it. The best thing to do is to just stick the pot right in the refridgerator. How long it needs to cool depends on how soft the margarine was. If it's a squeeze, it'll take a while. In general, though, you'll want to have it cool for at least one hour. Again, the longer the better, but the aim is to return the margarine to its original state, so if it's still softer than it was when it was in its container, keep it in there.

Once it is at its original hardness, take a knife, preferrably a sharp one, and scrape the edges of the pot. The margarine should come off easily. Then dig under the margarine and take it out - it should come out easily as well. Flip the margarine over onto a plate. If there are any small bits of pot on the margarine, gently scrape them off while trying to keep as much butter on as possible. This is another advantage to keeping it in the fridge longer - the longer you keep it in, the more these bits will fall to the bottom of the pot, meaning the less you scrape, and trust me, your level of frustration will drop.

Do not smoke these bits! For one, you're smoking margarine, which just isn't right. Second, there's next to no THC in them. The THC will have risen from the pot and taken refuge in the fat cells of the margarine, as THC is fat-soluble (guess where it stays in us humans?). You can just throw the pot out, it's worthless. Good idea is to throw it out in a package, that way nobody sees it.

So basically, the butter is now as effective as an eighth of pot. Literally, you can spread a bit of it on toast and get high. But brownies are damn tasty, so let's continue!

2. Add the cannabis-ized margarine and six ounces unsweetened vegan chocolate into a microwave-safe bowl. Nuke it for twenty seconds at a time and then stir, repeating until all the chocolate is melted.

3. Preheat oven to 350 F.

4. In a seperate bowl, mix the sugar, fake eggs, vanilla, and cocoa powder together. Stir well. Then add the chocolate-margarine mix and keep stirring. Finally, add the flour and mix for a while, until all lumps are out. Remember, the better you mix, the better the brownies.

5. In an eight inch pan, spread vegetable shortening or non-cannabis-ized vegan butter along the edges. Pour the mix in. (Another option is using muffins, in which case this makes about twelve.)

6. Bake for around thirty minutes or until when you can insert a toothpick in the middle and have it come out clean.

7. Allow to cool fully before cutting. I know, a long, long wait already, but be patient! You can always double the recipe (and use two eight inch pans or a nine by thirteen inch pan) and come out with double the brownies, but you need to double everything, including the pot.

8. Once cool, cut into 16 brownies. EAT ONE BROWNIE AT A TIME. Keep in mind that each brownie will have about half a gram of pot, so you WILL be high. Also, the high takes longer to kick in, but this means it stays around longer. It may take an hour to kick in, but it's worth it cause you'll be stoned for about five or six hours. It's a different type of high than smoking but you'll probably LOVE it.

Enjoy! And for god's sake, don't eat the brownies when you get the munchies, you'll get TOO high!
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